The end of this movie

makes up in a teensy way for the rest.

So it's been a bit

and I know the plan was for me to blog every day this month, but I haven't made that goal. At all. At the moment I am watching "I think I Love My Wife..." starring Chris Rock. I wish I could say I like this movie, but at this point it just irritates the shit out of me with it's stupid cliches and ridiculousness. There is something about this whole crappy genre of movies that treat wives like they are this ball and chain or thing to be put up with that just completely irritates the shit out of me. Not even just wives, but even those who have long-term commitments, all of it. It is completely insulting that in movies we are relegated to picking out wall sconces and wallpaper and apparently that is all we are good for. Blech. And another blech.

The other thing is that it assumes wives are these are ignoramuses who would have NO IDEA that their husband is being a ridiculous jerk off chasing some chick who can't stand on her own two feet to find someone not already with another person. Starting a fight to get out of the house? Blech, yuck, patooey!

So on the real side of things, my kids are fantastic and doing great things every day. I have been having a crapload of arthritis and although I am handling it better mentally, it is really jacking with my daily agenda.

I have also decided that it is officially my mission to let other moms know that most of us are not at all together and prepared and FANTABULOUS, that there are only a very select few who are able to follow that mode and the rest of use muddle along in a realistic way. At the preschool program tonight I was told by three other mothers that were not prepared for dressing their kids up for the program and how they'd rushed to get them appropriate clothes for the night. And how they STILL felt unprepared for forgetting tights/shoes/whathaveyou. I made it a point to let them know two of my four were in lunch stained shirts and all four were in play clothes and we barely had their hair brushed before the program started. I let all of them know that if they were even tempted to feel bad they should think about us.

In the end, while I (briefly) considered rushing home for program type clothes, I decided to roll with it. It was not worth it to rush and go and do so my kids could wear some certain outfit. And not once during that program did I even think about my kids' clothes. I was focused on their smiles and how they sang and did they dance. It was fun and great and FANTABULOUS. Even if they weren't dressed up in their finest and polished up.

My goal is to affirm to other moms that while we feel pressured to achieve some damn goal, the achievers are few and far between and us catcher-uppers are more common than anyone would like to believe.

P.S. I do work for the Lutheran Church and there is a Minister in my title and I STILL am not a super-mom. So there. Take that.

Mother's Day is almost here...aaah.

Yesterday a friend and I went for manicures and pedicures to treat ourselves for Mother's Day. It was fantastic. I hadn't been for either in a looooong time and forgot how relaxing it is. They had wonderful massage chairs-the best I've ever sat in-and did a great job. I had been in a lot of pain yesterday so it was especially nice to feel better. We laughed and had fun and just relaxed. I was a tad overwhelmed and edgy before, so it was to my family's benefit as I came home much happier. Wish I could afford to do it every week.

I have got to get some pictures uploaded, but I am too lazy right now. Colin lost his FIRST tooth and is very excited. As the youngest he often feels like he has to wait FOREVER for these kinds of things and he wanted to pull the tooth out himself when it was barely wiggly. I got him to wait and we pulled it out this morning, he is very, very happy and showing off his grin all over the place. The tooth next to it is wiggly as well and won't be too far behind.

On a hugely exciting note we will be moving soon. We are buying a house! We'll be leasing to own for a couple years, the seller can avoid tax penalties and it gives us a bit more time to get the loan in place. We're getting a great deal and the house is PERFECT. We cannot wait, we've been renting for way, way too long and as much as we've made this our home it just isn't that great and could be taken care of much better by our landlords. It will be so nice to be in our own place and have our money going towards something instead of into someone's pocket.

I can't wait, and am so excited. Except the move will happen around mid to end of June and it's MAY and I have a lot to pack and do. GAH!

I've started

yet another dishcloth. They are so handy and so easy to make and it is so easy to avoid working on a project that seems to be taking forever in favor of a quick little nifty dishcloth.

I'm toying with the idea of crocheting a bathroom rug or two, but because of the aforementioned projects I've been avoiding I don't want to start anything new. I really, really need to just buckle down and work on them. The crazy part is that I like working on them once I get going, so it makes no sense for me to avoid them.

I'm not sure why I expect myself to make sense though, you'd think I'd have gotten used to it by now.

Collect your money

I officially missed yesterday. If only I had popped on to dash off a quick note. Except I didn't.

I spent much of the day at church where the line is often blurred between my volunteering and working. For some I am told to put down hours worked, but for others its all volunteered. I ended up with the notes from the two hour afternoon meeting as well personal notes for all the things asked/given to me to do as a result of the meeting. Wheeeee!

I also went to dinner with a friend and it was very nice, very nice! I think both of us needed a break from husbands/kids/jobs/houses to vent and talk and laugh. I felt much better, especially after being sick and in spite of having fifty bazillion thousand things to do at work and home.

Apparently it was also Ex-Boyfriend Day at the restaurant we went to for lunch. First I saw an ex who I had almost married and was with for a long time. I haven't run into him for at least 8 years and it was sort of strange because he looks older and it was a reminder that I also look older and am indeed in my 30's. The other is a good friend and our daughters and sons now play together and I've gotten over the weird we're grown-ups now factor with him. I did tell my mom that we needed to get out of there because after one or two more ex-boyfriend sightings it could only go downhill from there

Alright

so I made yesterday's post on the 1st, but then didn't get it posted until today. But it retained the original date. So there you go. My only defense is that I have once again caught the latest respiratory whatever going around.

Sometimes I feel like Charlie Brown.

The handy thing about Identical Twins

is that if people want to know what they look like and there is only one of them around, I can say "There's another one just like her."*

*Disclaimer: Yes, we celebrate their individuality and they are not known as the twins or as one person, but as two entirely separate people who look very much the same.

This should've been my post for the 2nd, which I apparently did not actually publish to my blog.

I could've probably gotten away with

the post about posting every day in May as my actual first day of May post, but I'm going to shock you and post AGAIN! HA HA!

I had to post to show off Abbie & Arenne, who are now NINE years old and WAY WAY TOO OLD.



I realized the other day when talking with some moms about baby stuff that I no longer have any babies. I've known this for awhile, but this is the first time it really hit me that I NO LONGER HAVE ANY BABIES! I had four children in three and a half years and my world was baby central for so long. Wow. No babies. There's good and bad in that. The good is no more midnight bottles, diaper changes, diaper BUYING, spit-up, endless crying and all that. The bad is no more sweet baby smiles and giggles or baby head sniffing or soft baby cuddles, and well, you know the rest.

I will just have to snuggle other people's babies. And watch as mine get older and older every single minute.

Blog A Day? I think I can, I think I can...

The loverly Venus & Nicole are blogging each day of May and I am going to try to keep up. A smart woman would bet against me given my track record, but there's something to be said for not being able to shut my mouth and the ability to type fast. We'll see how I do!

I am officially a MOA

now that I have survived Advent, Christmas, Easter and Confirmation services. Whew.

The good news is that I am slowly but surely making my way through the mountains of files and learning the various equipment and software and feeling more on top of things every day. It helps to be feeling better and have more energy.

I had wanted to try to get some things made up for a craft fair we had this past weekend, unfortunately I have been having a rough go of it with the arthritis so I gave up on that idea. Hopefully next year. I did find some nice handmade rugs for my kitchen and get a new purse, woohoo!

I really, really hope to get some sleep tonight. This past week has been a restless one and I didn't have my usual time on the weekend to rest.

Not bad, not bad at all

were my doctors words at my appt yesterday. I told him that was good because I wasn't overly fond of bad.

I haven't needed an epogen or neuprogen shot in 3 weeks and after a fun-filled day and night of keeping my urine in a jug and then a big bad blood draw yesterday morning and THEN my doctor's visit I have found that all my levels look very good and things are going pretty darn well.

I do not have to go back for a month. I have a whole month of no blood draws, no hospital or doctor visits, no injections. A MONTH.

I will still have to do the whole pee in a jug thing along with the blood draws in a month, but I'll take every bit I can get.

I also get to take one less med. Life is good, not bad, not bad at all.

Yeah, I'm not finishing the photo post

because it has been forever and I just don't feel like it.

Sorry for not posting for so long, I am really not feeling well. Lots of joint pain, probably due to the dampness and rain.

I am not all that witty or interesting at the moment, but I am crocheting & knitting. At some point I will actually put some pics up.

Abbie & Arenne turned 9, it is so crazy how old they are getting, it's just too fast! They had a dog party centered around my mom's new dog, Petey. It was hilarious and a lot of fun.

Hopefully I will be on again soon and a little more interesting!

stolen from Nicole and Venus

Here’s how it works:
1. Go to www.photobucket.com
2. Type in your answer to the question in the “search” box
3. Use only the first page
4. Insert the picture into your Blog

1. What is your relationship status?

2. What is your current mood?



3. Who is your favorite band/artist?




4. What is your favorite movie?



*****Need to pause and will finish later!

5. What kind of pet do you have?



6. Where do you live?



7. Where do you work?



8. What do you look like?



9. What do you drive?



10. What did you do last night?



11. What is your favorite TV show?



12. Describe yourself.



13. What are you doing today?




14. What is your name?



15. What is your favorite candy?

Not ANOTHER shot!

So, my white blood count has dropped again. It's not as severe as last time, but it's low so I am back on the neupogen. At least it is only one time a week. So two shots once a week with CBC to monitor me.

Yesterday's epogen shot really hurt, they haven't been as painful, or so I thought. Maybe I was just used to the pain from having them so often and now that I am on one a week I am noticing more?

Congested and stuffed up again BLEH, BLECH. I am learning that remission does not equal feeling healthy and great, more that it is better but still with issues and pain.

On the yarn side I have finished a washcloth for each of the kids, but I haven't gotten pics yet. I started a shawl/poncho. The pattern is for an asymmetrical poncho but it doesn't seem wide enough so it might be a shawl in the end. I am trying to make up some things to sell for an upcoming craft fair, but I'm not sure I will have enough time. We'll see.

Drew's Bunny Imitation

Little by little

Everyday is a little better, thank goodness!!! I actually worked a full eight hour day (actually about ten total). Of course I then had to recover and am wiped out and in more pain, but I'll keep on chugging. The influenza cold crap seems a little worse, hopefully it is just part of the natural course but we're keeping an eye on it. I am tired of it though.

I've found a group about my condition-called Polyarteritis Nodosa, or PAN for short. I am so happy to have found it, it's a tremendous resource. The members are people like myself, family members, and doctors and nurses. It's really great to have found a group of people with so much knowledge and support.

I was getting some crocheting and knitting done everyday as well but have had a few days of a break from it, not on purpose but I've just been too tired. A friend is setting up a crafter show and has asked if I would be interested in having some things in it, so I need to get my behind in gear and make some stuff. Wheee!

Holy week is a busy one in my job so between work, home, and my illness it's about all I do.

Last night we had our Good Friday service, with a traditional tenebrae service. It was very beautiful and moving and sad. After each of the candles were extinguished a toll was sounded and we ended with a prayer at the front of the church, around the altar in front of the cross, and they ended with the sound of a door shutting-to symbolize the closing of the tomb. I was very moved by all of it, and was glad to see more people there than our last few Lenten services. Hopefully in true form we will have even more for Easter services. It's really interesting to be in on the inner workings with my job. I've grown up in the church but I didn't realize all of the many things I didn't know and still have yet to learn.

I'll end with my five year old's interpretation of Jesus from the children's sermon on Maundy Thursday (announced to the entire church), "Jesus was born in a manger and grew up and helped people and then he got dead." Now when this child speaks up in public my husband and I cringe, just waiting to hear what will come out of his mouth. This time I wasn't sure how to react, and in true sap form I have to admit I was a little moved at his understanding even if got dead isn't the best way to say it.

The Alien Has Landed

Drew totally loves his alien washcloth. I've started a dragonfly-another of Nicole's patterns-for Arenne and then will be a frog for Abbie. Colin has already asked for an alien like Drew's. The washcloths have definitely gotten me back into the swing of things. I'm also working on a hat in some Andean Treasure, using a bamboo crochet hook. There is something so soothing and satisfying watching the yarn become something. It's saved my sanity through all the illness and being stuck at home and not able to do much.

Alien Cloth time!

Drew, the 7 year old, has chosen his pattern for a washcloth-the alien cloth by Nicole of Purple Duckie. Out of the cotton yarn I have on hand he chose Sugar 'n Cream in Blue Grass. I am really digging the colors in this yarn. Next up will be a dragonfly cloth for Arenne. I am very happy to be friends with my yarn again, especially with this illness, or I'd be even more stir crazy.

Influenza, you have won.

It was a bitter battle and influenza has won. Completely and totally kicked my behind and I am down for the count. I slept much of the day away, aside from kid interruptions including the youngest rolling all over me, and am up briefly to take some medicine and have some soup before crashing again.

Listen, folks. I am trying to keep my spirits up. I want to be celebrating my newfound remission. Instead I am sick...AGAIN. Highly irritating.

On a nice note a friend went in to help organize my office where things have been piled on my desk waiting for my return-as I work in a church people often feel they have free reign in there-. Since I've been sick (or children have) for three weeks and counting there were massive piles everwhere. I've been given a new bookshelf, other shelves and organizers, and a cleared off desk. It feels like one of those makeover shows on hgtv. Now if I could just get well enough to actually be in said office.

Sigh.

Another washcloth done!

This time it's Nicole's Duckie cloth, for Colin. He chose the pattern and the color and loves it! Wheee! This influenza has hit me hard and it's been nice to be making things with yarn again so I don't go too stir crazy. Arenne and Colin are both feeling better, although Ari is still coughing quite a bit. Abbie & Drew have still not gotten this, I really hope they don't.

Off to the hospital for the shot I missed yesterday and to work to try to cram a few days worth of work into a couple hours. Fun, fun, fun.